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Make sure to like and subscribe to my channel.
My hair story begins at my roots. I’m mixed and my hair has a very different texture. It has really fine curls which means my hair has a tendency to be dry. Growing up I never had a problem growing out my hair and my hair actually grew very fast.
Growing up in the UK, there wasn’t anyone in my school that looked like me. There were other mixed girls in my school but we were all very different to each other. I always had my hair in a hundred and one braids thanks to my mum. This made me really self contours and insecure. When being with my friends they always had their hair open or in really cool half up half down styles and I was stuck with my hair in braids and even if I did open my hair my hair wouldn’t look or feel like my friends hair. This can really impact a young girls mind.
After we moved back to South Africa, my mum was told about a hair relaxer for younger girls and I thought it was the best thing ever. Even though it was made for young girl and had a special gel burn shield thing it BURNED LIKE HELL. But I was so excited I just held it all in. For that moment after I had blow dried my hair, all the burning way so worth it. Now my hair matched my skin and I can now fit in with all my white friends.
In order to keep up with all this amazingness, I had to relax my hair every 3 to 6 months. I did two more treatments with this brand then I decided to go in every 6 months with another brand for adults. Needless to say my hair was messed up. It had become dry and broken. My hair started breaking off. My scalp was extremely dry, flaky and I had developed a bunched of sores. My hair had seemed to have stopped growing completely. (I had to cut my hair to chin length in grade 5 because my ends were so broken. Only once I got to University, when I started my natural journey, did my hair reach just below my collarbone). I was in a co-ed school at this time and I had somehow heard that all the boys in my grade had nicknamed me “steal wool”. This brought me down and hung over me like a cloud for the rest of my schooling career.
One day, I was on Instagram and I found this girl (Frogurlginny) and I thought her hair was amazing. It made me so jealous knowing that my natural hair was of similar texture and I didn’t look like that. Her hair literally crowned her head. I was officially on a mission to go completely natural. I quickly learned what different products and oils are good for my hair and how to handle my hair. I decided to start with a little restyle by cutting my hair into a really short bob and just with that cut my hair started looking healthier. I started using olive oil and coconut oil straight away and my hair grow more that it had ever grown in 9 years.
As of present, my hair is still in transition. During December 2016 I had cut it to get the last of the damaged treated ends off the bottom section of my hair. My new natural hair is thick and grows at a good rate.However, majority of the top section of my hair is still quite damaged and I’m still hanging on to it because it makes it a lot of my length. Recently, I have struggled with anxiety a lot. After an episode, I woke up in the morning and washed my hair in the shower to find that a bunch of my hair had fallen out. However, as of now it is no longer a bald patch in front of my head and has filled in with one or two curls.
The thing I realized was I had a problem with accepting who I was. You always want what you don’t have, YES, but for me it was like I didn’t see myself as beautiful. (It really goes so much deeper then just my hair). I can remember at the age of 4 going to shopping centers and finding my mothers old friends and they would always say “She’s so beautiful-she’s so pretty” and I would always hide myself, in a way like in discussed and somehow just knowing that they were lying, even though that probably wasn’t the case. When I was in school in England, I would always hear girls tell their mothers that they wanted their hair like mine, I just saw myself as not pretty.
I am a vessel of so many stories. So many people, countries, journeys. These are in my shape, the color of my skin, in my eyes, in my hair. I might not know these stories but people still find these stories interesting. I would love to learn about these stories but until then I am more then willing to be the vessel.
Happy New Year
I know and understand why people don’t like these post and don’t believe in resolutions. However, I do believe in self improvement and bettering yourself. 2016 kick a lot of people in the backside. I for one had an extremely difficult time with a lot of things. At about mid November I decided I really need to change things. I was tired of wishing for better things, I decided it was about time I did things for myself.
I am also a believer in: once you say something and put it out it may become a little more easier to achieve these things. That’s why I’ve decided to share them this year. Also I can look back at this at the end of the year and see if I actually carried out any of these resolutions.
I would love to hear some of your resolutions. If you have any tips on how you have achieve any of my goals that would be a great help.